Change of Emotion

There is no hiding the fact that unemployment has been trying to get the best of me. As you can tell by my last post, I am a little confused as to what I am supposed to do next. Those feelings are still here, but each day I have more and more faith in the unknown. I am standing on a cliff looking down and knowing I have to jump, but not quite sure when.

For the past few weeks I have been completely down. I guess you could say I was a bit depressed, but the part that got me was that I knew I was depressed and that I didn’t need to be in that place. I was feeling so sorry for myself. Finally, I woke up one morning and said it was over. I filled my day with errands to run, bills to pay, a little sun shine and some exercise. I left the couch to fend for itself and applied for a few more jobs. I pushed out all the negativity and left only room for positive. I know my emotions will move up and down, especially with December creeping up and no plan in place, but I think I can handle the emotions. Just think, if we didn’t have emotions this sure would be one boring world.

I experienced something yesterday that made me realize I would much rather be in the position I am in right now than a lot of other positions I could be in. I was sitting in an empty resort café looking over the beach and talking with the manager. An older man walked in the door. My manager friend got up and silently poured a shot of vodka and handed it to him without a word being said. The man quickly inhaled his poison, asking for another. Once he was gone, my friend explained how this man comes into the café every day multiple times to get a shot of vodka. Supposedly his wife does not know he is an alcoholic, so he will sneak down to the café while going to “get the paper”, “do his laundry”, or “take a walk”. If he is ever to come into the café with his wife, the staff is supposed to act as if they have never seen him before. When I saw this man it was about 1:30 pm, and he had just been served his 7th shot for the day.

Makes you think….